Right now, Jones is sitting in his high chair, throwing toast and crackers on the floor as he babbles to himself. We are at the Downing house, and I am babysitting (i.e. the two little ones are outside playing in the snow and I am blogging). I’m drinking coffee and eating a bit of a chocolate pudding-brownie thing. An Elvis Christmas CD is playing (its all they had). All the makings of a regular afternoon.
Yesterday, we were over at our “old” place, and even though it was completely empty, it still felt like home. We brought in sandwiches from Doozy’s and sat on the dusty wood floor to eat them. I cried. When talking about the weirdness of this phase, Bryan described “goodbye” really well: a verbal recognition of a yet-to-come day when we will not see each other. This ‘yet-to-come’ is what makes long-term goodbyes so awkward, especially when, as in the case of moving to Japan, there’s no knowing the length between visits and conversations.
(Now Jones is toddling around the Downing kitchen, holding one of Knox’s cars and squealing — SO CUTE!!)
We are both (Bryan and I) in a bit of denial. There is still so much to accomplish, we find that we remain in “task-mode” and feel emotionally absent. Perhaps mentally absent, as well, since I’ve started forgetting whole conversations and losing the few personal articles that were not in the shipping container.
I wish I had more time to blog about the things that were happening right now.
As always, you can check out The Seed for more funding/moving updates.